Kim Jong Il

Even though his son, Kim-Jong Un now leads his communist dictatorship, many around the internet still talk about Kim-Jong Il and how his crazy life and his even crazier propaganda. In this article we will look at a few actual interesting facts about Kim Jong.

  • According to North Koreas newspaper, the Rodong Sinmum, Kim’s style has become a global phenomenon. Obviously, the entire world loves khaki colored shirts and matching trousers.
  • Again, according to DPRK state media, Mr Kim invented the hamburger. In retrospect, because he banned western influences in his country, he had to create the food himself to appeal to the population.
  • According to an ex-staff member of Kim, he fell off a horse one day and was afraid of becoming addicted to the prescribed painkillers. To combat being the only junkie, he had his staff injected with the same doses as him so that he wouldn’t be alone in his addiction.
  • He once sanctioned the kidnap of a South Korean director so that he could be forced to make propaganda films for the DPRKs regime.
  • Following in the wave of Hitler, he had all disabled and short people evicted from the capital of North Korea. He got rid of short people by distributing leaflets advertising a wonder drug that could increase height. All those who responded were promptly kicked out of Pyongyang.
  • He maintains a city that was built purely for propaganda. Whilst no actual residents live in the city, they use timers for the lights and street sweepers to show that there is activity there. In fact, most buildings do not have glass windows or are just an empty concrete shell of a building. Although, it does have the words largest flagpole complete with a 300lb DPRK flag.

Kim truly was a crazy little guy. Although it is my hope that the DPRK someday will join the real world and their citizens will be set free from the regime.